literature

Ch84: The Dove Still Flies

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Blossom looked up. Barasia was still facing the dormant older form, encased within that peculiar machine. However, Bell was slowly rising to her feet, pushing herself up to her knees and bringing her hand to her head with a soft groan as the world around her came back into focus. Blossom was surprised that Bell could even kneel; that hit to the head would have rattled her fairly badly if it hadn't at least broken something within her. Blossom hated feeling dizzy and hits to the head were enough to make her experience such an unpleasant feeling. But striking head-first into the solid steel floor, which was cold against her own hands and sock-covered legs, would have been ten, twenty, maybe thirty times worse. Decent headstrikes made Blossom feel sick. Watching Bell's own was no different. If that had been her, Blossom presumed she'd be in a coma, or perhaps bedridden for a month if lucky, resting the effects off. Blossom wanted to scoot over to her and help her to her feet, but she felt that getting to her own feet would be a challenge. Just putting the pain from her damaged wrist out of her mind made the rest of her body not want to move. No time to be lazy, though...

Barasia nodded, closing her eyes, "Good girl... you were always so resilient. I knew that if there ever came a point where I had to kill you, I'd had to do it emphatically and leave no doubt of your demise. A knock to the head doesn't come close, does it..."

Two crystal eyes glared through thick dark eyelashes, "I hardly felt it..." she muttered, still disoriented. The force of the impact had faded away, leaving a very mild ache. However, she felt quite giddy all the same. A sudden wash of anxiety came over her. Blossom! Was she alright? Was.... was her special girl ok? Her internal functions had not been entirely disrupted by the impact. She'd been out for several minutes, she could tell. In that time, a fight could have broken out, Blossom could have been hurt or worse, and even Earth's existence could've been erased. She hoped none of those had happened.

Barasia's eyes were still closed, "I'll be honest with you. Most of the weapons you may remember me for are no longer part of me. They were forcibly removed by my most recent adversary back on Cluster Prime. No doubt you would have heard about Queen Vexus back when you and your father worked alongside the Cluster... she was ruthless but ultimately flawed. I became convinced, when I defeated her and escaped her final deathtraps that I would not be stopped by anything. When I broke free of her hold and left her to burn in the mess she, herself, had created by allowing me to get so close..." Barasia slowly turned around, shadowed by her much taller, contained form, "I felt that I had just proven that all my hare-brained dreams were achievable... that the destiny our father created us for was not unreachable. I realised that he was not as insane as I once believed... even if he had left me to rust. I was battered and missing most of my weapons but I survived. I thought that my happiness would last forever, but..." Barasia's gaze fell, "I didn't know that I had at the same time lost..."

Bell noticed the sadness creeping into her rogue sister's voice. What could have crippled her jubilation so? The she recalled... the boy in silver and black with that peculiar cap on his scruffy dark hair... his participation in her every endeavour... his unwillingness to disappoint her. Last she had seen him, Buttercup had nearly kicked his head off. What could have happened to him? And... did he really mean that much to her? As far as Bell knew, Barasia did not have the capacity to care for someone; why should she? If her programming was centred around a selfish desire to become perfect and all-powerful, how could she possibly have room to care for someone else, especially someone as... well... imperfect as that boy Bulldog. Bell remembered doing away with his twin Beast by crushing him beneath a well-thrown iceberg. Bulldog, therefore, would not have been too much easier to dispose of. So why was Barasia upset? Did she not expect something to have happened to him? Why would she care for someone that under any other circumstance would seem far lesser than herself? But then again... she persisted with the attempts to coerce Bell to her ways. Perhaps she did care, but only when it suited her. Or perhaps there was a whole other side to her that Bell had never witnessed before...

Barasia curled her lip in a scowl that didn't seem to be directed at anyone. "Sometimes I hate myself... for allowing myself to become attached to someone so strongly that they interfere with the prime objective. After all, what's one mere life? What is it worth compared to all the others? All those I've KILLED!" To Bell's surprise, a tear fell from Barasia's eye. It was a different kind of pain she was feeling compared to those other times she had cried in front of her. There were no nanoprobes being forced into her brain. There was no harsh injury to agonise her. This was pure, raw emotion being felt toward someone she had lost. So finally, Barasia understood... "That's the price I paid, Bell... I made him so that he could share that destiny with me... because I knew somewhere inside that Reunification was impossible for you and I, so I made him so that I had someone else to be with instead, when the time came." She paused, her eyes shinier than normal with the tears that had begun to drench them, "You're probably thinking that I deserve it... that I never earned that right to have someone special beside me after all that I did... but if you've never loved someone yourself, how would you know? Bulldog was not a brother to me, Bell! Not even what happened to Breannin could compare to what happened to him..."

Bell realised her words to be true... sometimes, the love between two people got so strong that not even the love of family could come close. Bell had become somewhat desensitised to family love ever since Breannin died and although she loved Breannin so much, she had never loved someone with all her heart as to dedicate her life to being with them. Bell blinked and turned around to see Blossom gradually getting back to her feet. She hadn't loved someone that much.... or had she?

Barasia came forward with tentative steps as though walking was something she was new to, "So while I am so close to being perfect, Bell... so close to reaching my goal... part of me doesn't want to... because I'll be the only one of my kind. My goal is clear... destroy and become stronger. But when that happens... I will be alone. And that's something I fear more than death... more than those who are stronger than me... and more than watching my own little sister Bell needing to die for the need to satisfy the mission... I'll be forever alone after that... and what's the point of living forever if there's nobody to share that blessing with?" She brought her hands to her chest, where her heart would be. Bell was beginning to wonder... did Barasia have a heart after all? Perhaps she did... and just never showed it before... Barasia was staring at the floor coldly. She seemed to be at odds with herself now, "I'd go to any lengths to bring someone close to me into my life for the better... so if it can't be him, why can't it be the girl who is by all means family to me? Why can't it be the girl who I've always wanted to have by my side despite how much she hates me? Why can't it be you, Bell?"

"Some lengths aren't worth going to, Barasia..." Bell hissed, the image of the fake Breannin fresh in her memory despite the heavy hit to her noggin, "If you think that the hologram of Breannin could win me over, it's done anything but. I understand that you are determined to fulfill whatever 'destiny' you have stuck in your head, but you think it's your right to interfere in the lives of others to do so. It doesn't work like that. If what you were doing was harmless, I'd let you do it. But since you want to end the lives of countless people just to get YOUR way... that's why I am opposed to you. And... and I don't..." Bell lowered her gaze, uncomfortable suddenly.

Barasia shook her head, "It was YOUR destiny too! And it still is! What the hell HAPPENED TO YOU!?" she yelled, "It just shows you how much they've messed with your head! You got the idea that you could abandon everything you stood for just because I reduced precious 'Daddy' to something not even close to what he was! And I don't CARE if he was human! He wasn't human when he made us! That makes us BETTER than them! And yet you stay with them as though you owe them something!"

"I DO owe them something! More than you could ever realise!" Bell snarled, "That's why I don't want to joing you on your hunt for 'perfection'! Because I've already found the perfection I want. I have a family. One that cares about me so much! So go take your big new body and be all you can be! At least..." she shrunk away a little, eyes narrowed, "At least I will never be alone..."

Barasia blinked, eyes widening as they reopened, "Huh?"

Bell glared at her, "I said... at least I won't be alone..."

Barasia's eyes bore into her, "Bell, that's not funny. Stop it."

A small smile came to her face, "Because I have people who care about me..."

"Bell!"

"And I won't be on my own."

"Stop it!" Barasia was trembling.

"For the rest," Bell beamed, "of my life!"

Barasia clenched her fists, "ENOUGH!" she roared, springing off her feet and charging straight toward the girl who had enraged her. She should have never told Bell about her fear of loneliness. Maybe then, she'd have nothing to use against her. She tackled Bell, sending both of them crashing to the floor with Barasia on top. She reared up and swung her fist downward to have Bell dodge it by slipping sidewards. Barasia's hand drove itself into the floor, cratering it. Bell flitted into the air, escaping, but Barasia would not let her slip from her grasp that easily. Ignoring the dull ache in her knuckles, she sprung from the floor, slamming into Bell again, both gnarling at each other. She again slammed Bell into a solid object, this time the wall, crumpling the thick metal as though it were tin foil. Bell cried out in surprise moreso than pain, and swatted Barasia away with a punch of her own that knocked her to the floor. Barasia fell onto her back with a dull cracking noise, and for a moment her eyes were wide and staring aimlessly. But then she shook her head, fixed her eyes back on Bell and glared at her, teeth clenched. Bell preferred to stay right where she was. She was not about to rush into any of Barasia's surprise attacks. Her back still hurt, making her wince. At least Barasia wasn't all talk today. Bell took a moment to glance at Blossom, who was on her feet and slowly making her way forward toward them. Her right arm was limp and her fingers seemed to dangle with no real tension. What had she done to her hand? Bell zipped sideways, evading another fist from Barasia that instead smacked into the metal wall behind her. Bell shoved her away with her foot, biting her lower lip softly and hoping that Blossom was ok. She turned back to Barasia, catching the punch in her hand this time and holding her at distance.

"I know how you feel, Barasia." she told her, "I lost somebody close to me, too. It's just unfortunate that you're the one who made it happen."

There were still tears in Barasia's eyes. Her cheeks had flushed red too, "How could you know how I feel!? I'm trying to do everything I can to bring you back to me! EVERYTHING! I know it might hurt you but in the end it's better for both of us! Do you have ANY" she wrenched her hand free of Bell's grip, "idea how much I've had to put up with!? Everything that goes through my head is torture to me, Bell! And when I try to find answers, all I get are more questions! I killed Bree not only because I thought she'd keep me from getting you back with me, but because she was the one who really started those questions appearing in my head! But it did nothing, Bell! She was only the start of a much larger problem!"

Bell regarded her sister silently as she spouted her deepest feelings all at once. She had never expected this sort of reaction. She was crying... Bell didn't remember ever seeing her cry like this before.

"I'm... I'm t-trying to do everything that's right for the two of us!" Barasia cried, "And I tried to do what you did... and make friends that would help me! I made Bulldog too, so that I had someone to give my love to when I needed an outlet, a comfort and a friend! I tried getting to you! I tried helping my friends on Cluster Prime with their own futures! And I tried to make futures for myself and Bulldog! But no matter what I did, there was ALWAYS something ready to go WRONG!"

Bell was shaking her head.

Barasia's fists were balled and she was crying openly. "Bul-Bulldog was... he was killed and I couldn't do a damn thing about it. I got ahead of myself... I ran ahead... I wanted to be a hero for someone because the opportunity was there, and... and I did it. But when I came back... all that was left of him... was..." she broke off, sniffling and wiping her eyes, "S-So now I'm here... I'm here to give you one last shot... I haven't given up on you but I'm afraid I might have to... but you're just making fun of me, Bell! You KNOW I don't want to be alone... so why won't you be there for me!?"

Bell mumbled, "Barasia... this is so messed u- WAA!" she yelped as Barasia flung her sidewards and drove her shoulder into her gut, spearing her through the air until they again hit something solid. This time, Bell heard something crack beneath her solid-alloy spine and when she turned to see what she had collided with, she found herself staring at her own reflection with the stars beyond it. A thick crack that had not broken all the way through was trailing outward from where she had struck in several directions. They had slammed into one of the viewing windows, their only protection from the cold and lifeless vacuum beyond. She felt a shiver down her spine. Any harder and they could have broken through. She felt another shiver when Barasia's hands slammed onto the window either side of her shoulders and her tearful face came level with hers again.

"I don't understand it, Bell!" she screamed, "Everything I've ever been told stays with me! I don't understand it, and I DON'T CARE! So what if my father was really a human!? So what if I've had to kill people!? So what if I've ruined lives by ending others!? All these questions and all these things you say to me... are they supposed to help me!? Am I meant to change my ways just because I follow what is laid out in front of me!? Is it REALLY my goal to become what I want to become!? Well I don't NEED to answer those questions! I don't NEED your words of wisdom! I don't NEED to have people who love me! This is my destiny, Bell, and I am SO CLOSE TO IT! So to hell with what everyone says and what I'm afraid of. I DON'T NEED ANY OF IT!" she wailed. She managed to say no more, instead slumping forward and burying her face into Bell's chest.

At that moment, Bell felt a sensation she could not quite describe as she brought her hands to Barasia's head and held it against her as she cried like a helpless kitten. As she stroked that shiny dark hair and stared forward at nothing in particular, she could not help but feel the urge to cry, too. She shook her head again, unable to believe what she had been hearing. Only a few words left her mouth... and all of them pained her so much, "Barasia... you fool.... you poor, stubborn... misguided fool..."

Barasia sobbed, "Sh-Shut up... just SHUT UP!"

Bell sighed, "You need love, Barasia... you need wisdom and guidance in a world you might not be ready for... and... your destiny might not be what you think it to be..." she pulled Barasia into an embrace, floating down from the splintered window to land on the cold, metallic floor, her sister still in her arms. Despite being built second, Bell had been activated longer than Barasia. In terms of activation versus physical age, there was no clear answer as to which sister was older. But if physical age was anything to go by... then it was clear that there were times when the older sister was the one in need of a good hug. Bell knew that well... because it wasn't the first time where she had to do this for someone. She threw another glance to Blossom, who was standing shakily not far away, unwilling to interrupt the unusual turn of events she saw before her. Bell held Barasia tightly, whispering in her ear. "I want you to listen to me..." Barasia sniffled and released the hug, backing toward the encased supergynoid that was so close to being brought to life. Bell knew that reasoning with Barasia had ended in tragedy in the past, but this time she had the advantage of knowing exactly what the problem was. "Barasia... I can give you those things..."

Barasia blinked, splashing tears from her thick dark lashes, "Wh-"

"You've hurt me in ways that you probably cannot even imagine... there are people who I knew and loved so much who are dead because of you. And there are others who will never be the same again after what you've done to haunt their lives. I used to think that you couldn't be helped... because you were so corrupted by the Cluster after they hardwired you as a killing machine. But... after what you just told me, I can see that you still have your own free will... the decision to make choices and to question those choices... which you ARE doing but you're in denial about it. Barasia... think about it... is an eternity of solitude really worth the power you seek?"

Barasia couldn't bring her eyes to meet Bell's, "I.... don't know what to think.... so I follow what I believe in.... because I know what my eventual reward is..."

Bell narrowed her eyes, "How much have you lost already to get to this point, Barasia? How much has BOTH sides lost? You lost Bulldog... you left your friends on Cluster Prime behind... you condemn yourself to a life of loneliness if you proceed - a loneliness that you fear because you KNOW it's inescapable - and you destroyed your little sister because you thought that killing her would make the pain of her words go away when instead it only made them stronger."

Barasia hung her head, "And by doing that, you now hate me, so there's no way we can be together as family, either way...." her fists were shaking with anger.

But Bell replied with words that Barasia thought she would never, EVER hear, "I don't hate you."

Barasia lifted her head and stared her right in the eyes. But she could not even find words with which to respond. Not even an aghast sound of disbelief.

Bell pressed on, "The thing is... somewhere inside you there's a memory... a memory of being someone who you were intended to be all along. It's a memory that no doubt haunts you and hurts you every time you recall it, but it's one which also serves to remind you of who you once were. I'm not talking about the body you were born into - that's different. What I am talking about is the little girl who was designed to be the crown achievement of a man who had lost almost everything in his life. You were meant to be his victory. His angel. His everything. And it was by a terrible mistake that you didn't live long enough back then to be that way. But he loved you, Barasia. You have no idea how much he loved you."

Barasia bared her teeth, "He threw me away!"

Bell raised her hands before her, a gesture of tolerant, willful concession, "Yes, he did... and that was a mistake he would eventually regret. If he had've rebuilt you instead of designing me, none of this mess would have happened. You'd be happy, you'd be loved and you'd know what a true perfection is like! And... and I'd much rather not have lived at all and given you the chance to live in my place, rather than have things turn out the way they did." Tears trickled down her cheeks. She truly meant every word of what she had just said.

Barasia felt those words hit her like a Diamondback to the chest. "Y-You would... prefer to have never lived?"

"If it meant you were happy and that everyone you killed were spared... then I would have gladly given my place in this life to you. Because... I know all this is not really your fault. You're just misguided and you can't see things clearly. I wish there was a way to change that around, but there isn't. But I don't hate you, Barasia... please understand that..."

"So... what is there left to do?"

Bell snapped her gaze over her shoulder. Blossom was still watching on, pensive. She might not agree with what Bell was going to say next... but perhaps, in time, she'd thank her. She still owed Bell thanks for getting rid of that illusionary Breannin. If she had let that hologram get to her head, who knows what ideas would have started to grow in there. That Breannin hologram was just part of Barasia's attempt to coerce Bell. She wanted to be loved, and would go to any length to get Bell to be by her. She didn't realise the pain it caused. She was just a child at play. So Bell was ready to forgive her for that too. "Barasia... please listen... there's still time to fix things for you. I know there's a way in which you can live the life that was intended for you, the one where you are loved and kept safe by those who care for you. All those things you've done... all the hurt you caused... I'm willing to look past that and see the frightened little girl inside you... I want to help take that fear away and solve this... You deserve better than this. You got a raw deal and it wasn't fair. So please, hear me out.... come back with me. Come back and we'll get all this fixed. The Professor is such a caring person... he'll fix you... he'll make things better for all of us. And then... then when you are the same kind of person as me... we can be sisters again... loved and cherished by our family... you'll see how wonderful humans can be and it will prove that your beliefs about humans are all unfounded. They'll take care of you the same way they took care of me, Barasia..."

"You'd... you'd do that for me?" Barasia whispered. The tears had stopped falling.

"Barasia... of course I would. It's the happy ending for everyone... at least, the happiest we can possibly hope for out of this. Instead of coming with you... you instead come with me. It's Reunification, like you say, only you're part of a bigger family who all will love you once everything is sorted out. And you'd find that that, in itself, is its own perfection... because to live, grow up and be around such wonderful people... people who would do anything for you... people who you will love in the same way they love you... what could be more perfect than that?"

Barasia contemplated those words, blinking as she was taken aback.

"I'd do this for you because I don't hate you... in fact..." another tear dripped down Bell's cheek as she moved in closer to Barasia, who did not resist her approach, "It's quite the opposite... no matter what we become, we're still family." she leaned in and placed a tiny kiss on Barasia's tear-stained cheek. "Sister.... I still love you..."
The white angel is back, and she has news that stuns her raven sister.
© 2008 - 2024 Griddles
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Misone's avatar
Wow, if Barasia actually took Bell up on her offer, i would be totally okay with that, she's still responsible for a planet load of grief, misery and death, but to accept Bell's offer would be a clear act of owning up to the monumental shortcomings in her programming.

But its not to be is it? obviously only reading the rest will tell, but my cynical side is pointing to everything that's already happened as proof that, this last chance at redemption is going to blow up in everyone's faces.